Tell me… Who are you living for anyway?This obsession with people pleasing is really not useful when creating a life to be proud of. All the time spent worrying about how we are coming across, obsessed with the idea that somehow we can be successful and still be loved by every single person in the world. It is not possible and the earlier we learn that, the quicker we can get to our real life’s work.Too many people spend their whole life trying to keep their family happy, fitting into the idea that friends had of them and all the while, they keep themselves down as they try to fit into a box others have created for them.Are you tired of it yet?Here are some tips to become a person in service, rather than a people pleasing person.
Learn to Hear Your Own Thoughts
Too many people have learnt to stop listening to their intuition, their own thoughts, their own ideas. We grow up with parents who certainly mean well but impose opinions far too strongly on our developing psyche.
It is not that parents, friends do not love us. It is that they care sooo much for our safety that they forget that in order to grow, we must have free reign over our actions, we must bear the consequences.
We too must learn to take full responsibility for our actions and not seek to cower behind our relatives and friends. In business, it means we must hear our customers when they complain but learn to hear what our own thoughts and feelings say about the complaint. Separate the complaint about the service from feeling it is a complaint about us personally.
Learn to share your own thoughts and feelings
Learn to disagree when necessary. You may not agree with the direction your client wants you to go in. It is alright to say so. No need to get defensive about it. Just clearly state the way you feel about it. If they disagree with you, they are of course free to choose another supplier of your service who more closely aligns with their needs.
With relatives, use this statement frequently ‘How interesting!’ and really mean it. Every opinion is valid and being open to understanding may help you progress but even if it is not something you agree with, there is certainly no point getting annoyed and uptight about it.
Focus on respect
Respect for yourself by putting clear boundaries in place. Learn to respect yourself and your own values so you do not allow people to walk all over you in business or at home.
Respect for others means you do not overstep their boundaries as well. This also applies to your children. They may be smaller than you but learn to hear them out and respect their opinion. Treat others how you would want to be treated.

Today’s terrorism is driven by radicals who claim to know God and that anyone who is not in tune with their beliefs must be killed. This is not new as it has always been that people fight to protect what they believe in and to avoid anyone who can prove them wrong. Religious wars started in Mesopotamia even before civilisation came into the region. In archaeological records there is evidence that kings went to war against kings to prove they were the greatest gods.Their people erected monuments to them, they recorded their deeds and victories, and they buried them as if they were in paradise. That is because their subjects believed that the king could grant them everything they desired in the after-life where he was king, that is Father God.The symbols used in mortuary practices explain how the people thought and felt. It is in their language, however, that the truth about their behaviour is spelled out. As the start of language was symbolism with sounds attached tracing the meaning of those sounds back to their basic roots was a journey of discovery.’Ma’ is ‘mother’ in every language. Likewise ‘R’or ‘Ra’ is ‘power’ and ‘Ra’ was the sun god of Egypt. The letter [I] is ‘eye’ and the Eye God represents the sun. ‘Ma-r-I’ or ‘Mary’ is, therefore, ‘mother’s powerful eye’ and this was the chief god of ancient societies and especially that of Babylon, the home of the Islamic religion.It is her star that sits in the cradle of the moon on the flag of Islam and the city that bears her name is a ruin located 11 km. northwest of Abu Kabul in Syria. This was the second capital for the Amors after Babylon. Their next capital was Roma (reverse Amor) and here they became the Romans and their origin is buried in secrecy.Every religion can be traced to the same beginning where the Mother God is also the ‘or-s’, where ‘or’ is an ancient term for ‘sun’ and ‘s’ for ‘light’ or ‘spirit’. In later language ‘Ors’ gave rise to ‘horse’ and the white horse was a symbol of Mother God. That is the reason it is carved on the British country side near sacred sites. In some locations there are depictions of men with huge penises fertilising the horse.Around Britain and in Europe are huge erect stones that tell the same story. When the sun rises behind them the sun-star appears. They are called by the name of ‘men-hir’ and the sight represents a penis fertilising the earth through the star.There are many such symbols and in modern behaviour remnants of the power of the sun is seen in the horse-hair wigs worn by judges and barristers in law courts, the five point star that sits on the shoulders of generals, and on police insignia, over mosques and even over the Kremlin.What the religiously obsessed men fight and kill for and to protect is, therefore, none other than the sun.The real God is the Great Creative Spirit of the Universe and it is dishing out the terror, disasters, and all things associated with human behaviour. We are at the end of the day and the promise is that most of the world, as we know it, will be destroyed along with those that provoke the Spirit.There is a trap to catch out the religions and bring them to an end. That was set up from the beginning and it is loaded with evidence that shows conclusively that the false gods and all the host of heaven will be dissolved because they are not real.”And all the host of heaven shall be dissolved, and the heavens shall be rolled together as a scroll: and all their host shall fall down, as the lead falleth off from the vine, and as a falling fig from the fig tree.” Isaiah 34:4

Before you head off to you next conference determine what you will do with the contact information of those people that you met. You need to have a system in place before you leave on how you want to follow up with all the wonderful people that you meet at the conference. Please do not go to a conference and not follow up with the people that you meet. You may learn some great information, but if you do not follow up with the people you talked to, it is a wasted opportunity. You never know where it might lead.Here are three ways to follow up:1. Bring a business card scanner with you to all conferences. At the end of the day, scanner the business cards of the people you meet and schedule times to follow up with each person or write an email to them and schedule it to go out a few days after the conference when you know they will be home and settled. It can be the same email, just change the names and add a detail your conversation.2. On your smart phone, enter in all information from the business cards into your phone and make a note of the name of the conference where you meet these people. Also, schedule a time to touch base with this great people, so that you do not forget.3. Smart and simple choice – Take a envelope out of the desk draw of your hotel desk and stick all the business cards in there. Stick the envelope in your carry-on in a place where you will see it when you get home. If you are a master at delegating, stick them in an envelope and Fed Ex it to your personal assistant or virtual assistant, so that they can mail a letter or email to your new contact. Have your assistant enter all the information into your office systems as well.You never know where following up with someone might lead. They might connect you to your next speaking engagement. They might be your next client. They might be a great affiliate marketer for you. Follow up!